Golden Joke
by Vivid Tear
Summary: What happens when Apollo has to watch the Hunters for a while? Nothing good. If your a guy, it's a suicide mission. Gods, what was Artemis thinking?
1. Chapter 1

A/N

So, I plan to write a bunch of Romance/Humor stuff to even out everything.

This idea came from none other than Alexander Caesar! Check her out. Really.

Enjoy~

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><p>Apollo was bored. It was summer, so the days seemed to stretch out. He was leaning out of his car, as he had set the car on auto-pilot.<p>

He was gazing out into the wilderness when he remembered that he had a sister to bother. He smirked, and teleported to her. The sun wouldn't crash. Hopefully.

He reappeared in a tree, giving him the perfect view to spy on Artemis and her Hunters. They were currently hunting a wild boar. Perfect.

Just as they were about to shoot their arrows, Apollo shot a golden one at the wild animal, killing it in one shot. He jumped off the tree.

"Hey ladies, little sister. God of music, poetry, archery, medicine, and practically everything else awesome, at your service." He winked at the girls, working his charm.

Artemis sighed in irritation. "Gods, Apollo, don't you have the sun to attend too? It'll probably crash sometime soon."

"It won't crash! If it does, I'll blame the wind gods. Geez, Arty, you worry too much." He flashed her a golden smile.

"…Fine. You can stay a while, if you do me a favor. I have to speak to Father about something. Watch my girls." Artemis glared at him with her strange silvery eyes.

"And don't you dare touch them!" With that, she teleported off.

This day kept on getting better and better. Apollo grinned. He turned towards the Hunters, who were all glaring at him. One of them caught his eye.

"Hey, Thalia, is that you? Geez, you look different. Come here, give me a hug." He held out his arms.

She glared at him. She looked really different from the last time he saw her. Instead of her usual black clothes, she was wearing the silver clothes the Hunters wore.

"Not in my lifetime, I don't want to have to emotionally scar you like every other boy that crossed my path." All the girls grinned. Apollo frowned.

"Well, I thought you would like a hug. Doesn't everybody?" Apollo flashed a smile.

"Quit it, or I'm going to kick you where it counts." With that, the Hunters turned to go back to camp. Apollo followed them.

"Hey Thals, you want to make s'mores? We've got everything." Phoebe, another Huntress, was talking to Thalia.

"I feel another haiku coming up!" Apollo grinned. The girls scowled.

"Ahem…" He cleared his throat.

"Huntresses like s'mores,

The mighty me will help them,

I am so amazing."

The Huntresses winced.

"The last line had six syllables. The god of poetry failed." Thalia smirked.

"Fine… I am so awesome. Happy? Even the god of awesome makes mistakes. Let's make s'mores!" Apollo grabbed the ingredients.

When they all had their treats, he slung an arm around a Huntress. If only he knew what he was getting himself into…

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><p>Artemis watched the scene from a TV up in Olympus. All the gods crowded around. It was the summer solstice, and after the meeting was over, all the gods (besides Apollo) had decided to prank him since he left early.<p>

"Heh, never knew girls could be so violent." Ares smirked.

"Do not underestimate my Hunters, Ares. Although my brother deserved it." Artemis watched Apollo get beaten up.

"If he ate more cereal, this wouldn't be happening." Demeter said. Persephone (who was with her mother at the time) rolled her eyes.

"Cereal, shmearial! I love watching poor souls flirt with Hunters. I know it'll never happen!" Aphrodite examined her flawless nails, then seemed to find a microscopic problem and started filed them.

They all stared at the Celestial bronze TV Hephaestus made. Apollo was a mess. He had marshmallows and melted chocolate smeared on his blond hair. His clothes were all ripped up, and he was cradling his manly area like someone (cough-Thalia-cough) had kicked him.

"Apollo shouldn't have done that. It's simply _obvious_ that none of the Hunters care for him." Athena rolled her eyes. Aphrodite held in a giggle.

"Oh, who cares. It's not like he can _die_ or anything." Dionysus twirled a grape vine around his finger, lazily lounging on his throne.

"It's too bad that he's an organic life form. Automatons wouldn't even feel that." Hephaestus's beard caught on fire. He swatted it out.

Poseidon spoke up. "Ah, well, I'm starting to pity Apollo. Artemis, you should go help your brother." He grinned, his sea green eyes twinkling merrily.

"Yes, before they tie him up and hurl him off the mountain." Zeus looked at his son, who was spazzing in pain on the ground.

They all laughed while Artemis teleported off.

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><p>Apollo didn't know what happened. One second he was sitting by the campfire, the next, he was on the ground in pain, holding his crotch.<p>

Artemis appeared in a bright flash, kneeling down next to him. She examined him, then glanced at her Hunters. Unknown to Apollo, she winked at them.

"Apollo, what did you do? You're a mess. Mother wouldn't have approved." Her tone was stern. She trickled nectar, the drink of the gods, onto his wounds. She gave him piece of ambrosia.

He winced in pain, then chewed on the ambrosia. Almost instantly, his cuts healed. He sat up, looking at Artemis.

"I don't know, Arty. I don't know." He looked at the Hunters. They were all looking at him and Artemis, stifling giggles.

"I think you should leave now, the sun is supposed to set in a few minutes. Did it crash yet?" Artemis's eyes danced with humor.

"Haha, Arty, very funny. I'll see you soon." He teleported back to his car.

The last thought he had before he steered the sun in for the night:

"Gods, I need a woman to bang."

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><p>AN

Finished! How was that? I know you people are getting tired of sad stories. Funny one, right here! I feel so accomplished. ;)


	2. Bye-bye!

Alright, so I thought people would get the message after I dropped off the face of the Earth, but guess not.

I'm done with this place. The experience was great, but I've switched writing websites. Can I just say that my writing has improved since I started on this website? If you're curious, I'm Vivinin on Wattpad. It's a lot more colorful and user-friendly. XD

So thanks for all the support! I appreciate you sticking with my terrible writing and I hope you guys all have a wonderful life and/or happily ever after. :D

Bye-bye!


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